Debriefing, de-escalation, and relationship repair (with Crissy Mombela)

Our thoughts, feelings, and behaviors don’t have to define us. 

This is an important thing to remember for adults dealing with professional burnout and compassion fatigue; and it’s also important to model for kids.

When school discipline focuses on punitive measures alone, we miss out on opportunities to teach kids how to manage emotions or repair mistakes. 

That’s why I’m so excited to share this second half of my conversation with Crissy Mombela in “De Facto Leaders” episode 153, where we talk about the importance of debriefing, maintaining safe school communities, and teaching kids how to restore relationships. 

Crissy Mombela is the Program Director for the REACH initiative through the Partnership for Resilience. She leads the REACH Communities of Practice (CoP). Her work allows her to be a thought partner and leader in the implementation and evaluation of the REACH Initiative, a strategic partnership with the Center for Childhood Resilience at Lurie Children’s Hospital, and the support of the Illinois State Board of Education. With over twenty-five years of public education experience as a special education teacher and administrator, Crissy’s focus is on developing systems that support connection, innovation, and belonging within school communities. Crissy earned her B.S.Ed. with a concentration in special education from Northern Illinois University and her M.Ed. in Educational Administration from Loyola University. 

Crissy currently holds an Illinois Professional Educator License for teaching and administration with endorsements for directing special education programs and teaching English Language Learners. In her free time, Crissy enjoys traveling with her family, baking, and scrapbooking.

*In this conversation we discuss some sensitive topics relating to traumatic events in schools. 
In this second half of our conversation, we discuss:

✅Why does skipping the debrief after a crisis situation increase the likeliness of compassion fatigue?

✅Crisis prevention: How do we take a proactive approach to de-escalation?

✅The impact of social-emotional learning for adults: Why it’s not just about the kids.

✅Restoring a safe community after physical altercations between students.

✅Minimizing retraumatization during the debriefing process.

✅Teaching relationship repair and the impact it has on the well-being of all parties.

✅Why debriefing should be a part of crisis drills.

The following resources were mentioned in this episode:

The REACH Initiative at the Center for Childhood Resilience (Link here:

The Partnership for Resilience (Link here:

Elena Aguilar Coaching Resistance Podcast Series (Link here:

Neurodiversity Strengths Checklist (Link here:

Ladder of Inference TED Ed by Trevor Maber (Link here:

Reclaiming Youth At Risk (Link here:

The Whole-Brain Child (Link here:

National Center on Safe Supportive Learning Environments (Link here:

Conscious Discipline - Bailey (Link here:

Relationship, Responsibility, and Regulation (Link here:

CHAMPS (Link here:

Hacking School Discipline (Link here:

We Want to Do More Than Survive  (Link here:

Other People's Children - Cultural Conflict in the Classroom (Link here:

In this episode, I mentioned The School of Clinical Leadership, my program that helps related service providers guide their teams to support students’ executive functioning across the day. This program will help you plan direct therapy, but will also help you lead change management on your team, no matter your job title. You can learn more about the School of Clinical Leadership here: 

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Debriefing, de-escalation, and relationship repair (with Crissy Mombela)